Paying For The Rehearsal Dinner

My son is on his second marriage, however for the bride this is wedding number one. My husband and I paid for the first rehearsal dinner, and do not feel obligated to pay for this one.

The wedding is in Mexico which is already quite an expense, and his bride to be is insisting we pay for the rehearsal dinner to the tune of $1600.00. We were not asked, we were told that it is our obligation as the groom’s parents.

We wouldn't mind helping but feel the price is too much, and that we have already fulfilled this obligation on his first wedding! What is the proper thing to do?

Our Thoughts

We are in total agreement with you on this one. The best advice we can give you on this is to be honest with both your son and your future daughter-in-law right away.

Lead off your discussion with the fact that you are very excited and thrilled for both of their happiness, but when it comes to the rehearsal dinner you are not going to be able to pay for it due to the fact that you are paying for the trip to Mexico and also since you paid for the rehearsal dinner the first time around.

If you are uncomfortable addressing them both, definitely sit down with your son and simply explain that you would like to contribute something to the festivities, but feel since you have paid for the first wedding's rehearsal dinner, that it is unfair for him to ask again.

Also, try to make it clear that this is not an attack on the bride, you simply aren’t able to do it for the reasons already mentioned (which are very good reasons).

Stick to your guns, be honest and have a great time in Mexico!

To Your Wedding!
Danielle & Stephen

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